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“Cause we like to party” said Beyonce, featuring Andre 3000 circa 2011, and also every single person at Dreamforce.

For one week every year, San Francisco turns into a weird alternate dimension of Mardi Gras…albeit with more clothing involved (required?) but surprisingly around the same amount of alcohol. Last year marked my first foray into the dark side of the CRM world. I thought I was ready, I really did y’all. Afterall, how much trouble could a bunch of software enthusiasts actually get into?

The answer is a lot. A whole hell of alot. I honestly had no idea what I was up against and I’m kind of a party monster so this is to serve as a PSA that next week is going to be bonkers, but also help you navigate the slew of parties and debauchery ahead. Thank me later.

All of these and more can be found in Partyforce – your go-to source for all things Dreamforce. Check it out to find parties, post pictures (careful though, Dreamforce is a bit like Vegas), and who knows, maybe even find a new friend or two.

Just like the Von Trapp kids, let’s start at the very beginning!

Monday Funday

Pre-Dream Cocktail Party – I used to live in Napa and I regularly drink much more than the doctor-recommended volume of wine, so trust me when I say Press Club knows what’s up. Also, free food. FREE FOOD.

Tipsy TuesYAY

Camp Outfierce 2016: Outforce Party – There are a few things I love more than schmoozing for a charitable cause. If you’re in this camp, and I hope you are, then Camp Outfierce is your Tuesday night spot. If you haven’t guessed, Outfierce is the official LGBTQAI party of Dreamforce. This year, they will be donating 100% of the proceeds to The Trevor Project. Eat, drink, and be philanthropic!

AdRoll RollerDisco – Mother of pearl. WHO PLANNED THIS PARTY!? Please look me up and add me to all social networks immediately because you are FUN. I don’t really have anything else to say other than there will be an open bar, rollerblades, and a GIFbooth, whatever that is.

The People’s Party – The tagline for this party is “Join top-tier marketing and sales leaders and put your hands in the air to celebrate the rising of ‘the people’ who have joined the ABM revolution”. Sounds a little Jim Jonesy to me, but, what’s life without a little risk? Pass me that sweet Kool-Aid and sign me up!

WINE-d Down Wednesday

Avio San Francisco Sunset Cruise – I’ve been really into aquatics and nautical prints lately so that’s why I’m drawn to this bad boy. Enjoy free cocktails, appetizers, and a beautiful view of the city – bonus – your windblown hair will have you looking fine just in time for the U2 concert.

Thirsty Thursday

The Annual Novela Launch Party – I put this on the list because Novela is fancy AF and a little out of my price range, so any chance to drink their libations on someone else’s tab is a pretty sweet deal. They’re also giving away copies of Customer Obsessed. Never heard of it, but maybe you have? It also costs $26 on Amazon, so if you’re an extreme couponer like myself, this makes for another win.

Pardot B2B Marketer’s Bash ft. Flo Rida – Boots with the fur. Nothing else need be said.

MAPANYTHING Spin Ping Pong Social Club Party – At first glance, I read this as “MANANYTHING” which sounds like a weird theme party that I’m semi-into. I’m not one to be politically correct but I think the appropriate name is Table Tennis, not Ping Pong. Neither here nor there, there’s an open bar and that’s what matters.  

Honestly, there are so many parties happening next week that I’m already dehydrated and headachey just thinking about all of them. There are too many to note here without writing a trilogy so I suggest pulling out your phone, downloading Partyforce, and mapping out your week!

Don’t forget to @mention me in the app (Claire Sands) so I can keep up with all of your shenanigans!